CURRENT MISSION

My mission is to gather precious minerals for my home planet.

ABOUT ME

I was in Stanley Park today, playing Chicago by Sufjan Stevens on my guitar, when I noticed a shining bead on a rock, reflecting light. I thought to myself, "Well this must be a gold earring that a crow stole and dropped out of his nest! What luck!"

After I finished the song, I took a closer look and it wasn't gold at all but a drop of sap from what I thought was a hemlock tree. "Hmmm..., that will be tasty!," I thought. So I dipped the end of my chewing grass in it and put 'er in my mouth. It tasted like tree sap does, piney, refreshing, sticky...

And then this happens... I think, "Wait! Hemlock! That's how Socrates died! Oh no. What have I done?!" I began to feel strange; It was difficult to smile, my extremities started to tingle, my leg muscles were cramping. I was way out past Prospect Point where even joggers and hobos rarely venture. If I can just get close to 3rd beach before I collapse, someone may find my body and get me to a hospital.

As I lumbered through the forest, I ate some clover to try to neutralize the deadly poison which was stuck to my teeth. But the taste was still prevalent and my vision started to get shaky...

Alas! The sounds of ocean! I'm close enough that perhaps a good samaritan will take my lifeless body to St. Joe's hospital! I stumble toward what looks like a lifeguard/first aid and tell him about my horrible mistake. Just before I can give him instructions on what to do with my mortal remains, he says, "You'll be alright."

And I am... Tsuga Canadensis, eastern hemlock; The needles make a delicious tea, I hear. Conium Maculatum, poison hemlock; The stuff that did in good ol' Socrates. These are two very different plants, my friends.

I made a lot of mistakes, in my mind, in my mind.

Why I’m on Couchsurfing

HOW I PARTICIPATE IN COUCHSURFING

I cook. McDonald's shall not enter these premises. Let me make you real food.

Interests

• dining
• cooking
• guitar
• beaches