(Our hosting facilities having some down time. We apologise for the inconvenience.
We are assuming that we can offer hosting in the late 2019.)

I can host and you can leave my flat in one piece. I guess this two is the most important part for most of you.
Rest of the profile is for my self entertainment

About Me:
I am a terrible person. Why? Everyone seems good but where the bad people are then??
I must be bad because no one else is..

WARNING: SARCASM ALERT

LETHAL LEVELS OF SARCASM CONTAMINATION DETECTED
Exposure to sarcasm may cause:
Temporary communication loss
Severe misunderstandings
Depression
Silence

Why I’m on Couchsurfing

THE COMMON ANSWER

I host because I love the aura created by the cultural interaction between me and my guests and I fight with the capitalist system while offering accommodation for free. I am so activist by the way. Much yoga very vegan.....Hipster

HONEST ANSWER

We are on couchsurfing for FREE accommodation???

TRICKY ANSWER WITH HIDDEN REALITY

People are on Couchsurfing because they are looking for S.E.X

S.E.X: Self Exile

Yea, self exile. What were you thinking??

MY ANSWER

I am looking for young talents to act in my summer teenage slasher horror movie.

"Filthy Couches of Grey: No one can hear you scream"

The Plot:
You will be traveling to a foreign country with your friends* and then manage to find yourself in the most fucked up neigborhood while ignoring all the very obvious signs of it along the way. Then because it wasnt already enough you decide to take shelter in the most horrible house of this filthy neighborhood.
Which obviously belongs to me....(evil laughter)
Seriously what is wrong with you? Cant you just get a decent hostel in the city center? Sleep in a tent?
Call the embassy ask for shelter? OR SIMPLY STAY HOME? Especially not in MINE???

*Your friends can be imaginary if you are retarded. Creates some plot twists.

Regardless of your gender you can join the audition if you have a pair of boobs. A boob is a boob so any boob will just do fine. Gender equality; Check.

Payment will be very generous. (If you can survive)

COUCHSURFING EXPERIENCE

level 30 necrohoster

Interests

Girls, cars, football....
I guess I am supposed to like these.

But I hate football and I prefer motorbikes.
And I like girls when they are not girlish.

• boobs
• beeewbs
• chuck testa

Music, Movies, and Books

Host me baby one more time
Stairway to host
Babe I am gonna host you
Host to be wild
Host of the rising sun
Sweet host o'mine
Hostforgiven
I will always host you
Dont you need somebody to host
No host no cry

Host club
Host in translation
Host busters
Harry hoster
A clockwork host
Host host bang bang
No host for old man(true)
Eternal sunshine of the hostless mind
The good the bad and the host
Where the wild hosts are
Lock stock and two smoking hosts
Live free or host hard

The lord of the hosts
The host of monte christo
Brave new host
Host in the time of cholera
Hosts guide to the galaxy,
The host who sold his ferrari
The host of the earth-sea
The hosts of the Pal street.
The host in the rye.
Ninetteneightyhost

One Amazing Thing I’ve Done

There are more than six billion people on earth, millions of people in your city, many people around you and you can still find yourself alone...
Isnt it amazing?

Teach, Learn, Share

???? what do I suppose to write here

What I Can Share with Hosts

one more cup of coffee

Countries I’ve Visited

Georgia, Germany

Countries I’ve Lived In

Turkey

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