CURRENT MISSION

"To meet, greet and enjoy the company of the most charming people"

ABOUT ME

I am a dynamic figure, often seen scaling walls and crushing ice. I have been known to remodel train stations on my lunch breaks, making them more efficient in the area of heat retention. I translate ethnic slurs for Kenyan refugees, I write award-winning operas, I manage time efficiently. Occasionally, I tread water for three days in a row. I woo women with my sensuous and godlike trombone playing, I can pilot bicycles up severe inclines with unflagging speed, and I cook Thirty-Minute Brownies in twenty minutes. I am an expert in stucco, a veteran in love, and an outlaw in Peru. Using only a hoe and a large glass of water, I once single-handedly defended a small village in the Amazon Basin from a horde of ferocious army ants. I play bluegrass cello, I had trials with Manchester United, I am the subject of numerous documentaries. When I'm bored, I build large suspension bridges in my garden. I enjoy urban hang gliding. On Wednesdays, after work, I repair electrical appliances free of charge. I am an abstract artist, a concrete analyst, and a ruthless bookie. Critics world-wide swoon over my original line of corduroy evening wear. I don't perspire. I am a private citizen, yet I receive fan mail. Last summer I toured Eastern Europe with a travelling centrifugal-force demonstration. I run the 100m in 9.65 seconds. My deft floral arrangements have earned me fame in international botany circles. Children trust me.

PHILOSOPHY

One Love to rule them all One Love to find them One love to bring them and in the darkness to bind them

Interesses

. I can hurl tennis rackets at small moving objects with deadly accuracy. I once read Paradise Lost, Moby Dick, and David Copperfield in one day and still had time to refurbish an entire dining room that evening. I know the exact location of every food item in the supermarket. I have performed several covert operations for the CIA. I cna ytpe 300 wrods pre mniuet. I sleep once a week; when I do sleep, I sleep in a chair. While on holiday in Canada, I successfully negotiated with a group of terrorists who had seized a small bakery. The laws of physics do not apply to me. I balance, I weave, I dodge, I frolic, and my bills are all paid. On my weekends, to let off steam, I participate in full-contact origami. Years ago I discovered the meaning of life but forgot to write it down. I have made extraordinary four course meals using only some vegetables and a Breville Toaster. I breed prize-winning clams. I have won bullfights in Madrid, cliff-diving competitions in Sri Lanka, and chess competitions at the Kremlin. I have played Hamlet, performed open-heart surgery and I have spoken with Elvis.

• documentaries
• dining
• cooking
• running
• gardening
• chess
• traveling
• origami
• scuba diving
• hang gliding
• tennis
• physics

Uma Coisa Incrível que Eu Fiz

None

Ensine, Aprenda, Compartilhe

Its the meaning of a full life

Países que Visitei

Cambodia, France, Germany, Greece, Ireland, Italy, Mexico, Netherlands, New Zealand, Spain, Sri Lanka, Sweden, Thailand, Tunisia, United States

Países em que Morei

Belgium, United Kingdom, United States

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